If Peace of Mind is Your Goal

If Peace of Mind is Your Goal

If being right is your goal,
you may find error in the world,
and seek to change it to match your expectations.

But don’t expect peace of mind.

If peace of mind is your goal,
look for errors in your expectations;
seek to change them, not the world.
And always be prepared to be wrong.

– Peter Russell


The following are thoughts that have come from hearing the above quote…


Relationships Begin With YOU



Understanding and beliefs about self


If this statement is true, if my relationships really are a mirror, reflecting my internal beliefs, then the only way to change my relationships is to change my core beliefs about me.


When I found myself years ago in an unhappy place in my relationships, I was shocked to realize that there was a part of myself I didn’t like.  I was successful in my chosen profession, making a lot of money, respected and well liked – what wasn’t there to like?  “This is nuts” I thought,  “these other people just need to get there act together and then I will be fully happy.”  And, I was wrong.


After years of work, which provided the strength and courage I needed, I opened the aperture allowing in the light so I could see more fully – Who Do I Really Think I AM. While there was much about myself that I could appreciate, there was a significant part of myself that I hid or was ashamed of. And it was these parts, neatly tucked away in the shadows that changed and shaped my most intimate relationships.


I spent the next few years working in the shadows, sifting threw beliefs and truths, finding each parts strengths and gifts – I learned to honor all of me. I noticed a profound shift in how I related in the world.  I let go of judgement, because I had stopped judging myself.  I let go of resentments, because I no longer did things in order to get love that I didn’t want to do. I could hold space for those I love – the good the struggling and the frightened, because I could hold and honor all those parts of me.


This is not a journey for the faint of heart nor is it a selfish act.  This is a journey for humanity. Until we embrace our most authentic self we continue to wage war.  At home, in the office, through our governments and policies. We judge, compare, separate and divide – as we judge, compare, divide and separate ourselves.


It is now the work that I do to walk with others as they shine their own light into the shadows – and embrace what we find there.



Speak Your Mind